Why Therapy Works by Louis Cozolino

Author:Louis Cozolino
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company

CHAPTER 9

Social Status Schema:

Our Place in the

Social World

It is better to have a lion at the head of an army of sheep, than a sheep at the head of an army of lions.

Daniel DeFoe

OVER THE PAST decade, many psychotherapists have adopted the concepts and discoveries that have emerged from research on human attachment. The compatibility between psychotherapy and attachment theory lies in their shared appreciation of the importance of early intimate relationships on the development and functioning of our brains, minds, and subsequent relationships. The shaping of attachment schema and an appreciation of their connection with everything from physiological regulation, to resiliency, to abstract abilities have become woven into how therapists conceptualize and work with their clients. An understanding of the connections between early attachment and the shaping and impact of core shame has also demonstrated increasing clinical utility.

What is seldom directly addressed in psychotherapy (or in the research) is the significance of social status schema, or the role played by early experience in the shaping of how we behave in social groups. Like an attachment schema, a social status schema is a form of implicit memory that shapes how we relate to others and the roles we take on in groups. In addition, social status schema leverage the primitive neural circuitry of anxiety and fear to guide us into alpha and beta roles across situations.

Knowing Your Place and Doing Your Job

As mammals became more social, larger groups came to have a competitive advantage for land, food, and other resources. But if the benefits of size are to be realized, strategies for cooperation, organization, and leadership need to be established. Social behavior within primate groups is guided by neurochemicals, hormones, and natural instincts that seem to support group survival. Despite becoming civilized, the strategies of organization and social hierarchies that are seen in our primate relatives continue largely intact within us to this day. Many of the behaviors that have been observed in monkeys, apes, and chimpanzees are readily observable on the playground, at the office, at cocktail parties, and in social media.

Although hundreds of books on attachment crowd our shelves, few even mention issues of social status. This may be because therapists are, for the most part, outside of the social arena and are involved in a solitary career. It is even a bit confusing to know where therapists fit into the social hierarchy. Another reason may be that therapists see social status as a less important spinoff of attachment security, which does not appear to be the case.

Although I can only guess as to the reasons, the avoidance of an exploration of social status schema has left a large hole in an area of vital importance to our ability to love and work. How we deal with social status is of central concern in the development of self-esteem and self-identity. This chapter and the next are an attempt to address the existence of social status schema and how we might begin to think about addressing them in psychotherapy.

Why We Have Social Status Schema

The manager accepts the status quo; the leader challenges it.

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